As cheesy as it is, I am here because I left my heart in San Francisco. I moved here to love someone else and I choose to stay here after discovering that the path to hell is paved with good intentions, for the love of myself and love of the city I have come to call home. After several years of being a tourist in SF I was convinced to go west by charming Victorians, being able to walk places, and the idea that I could live in a city where LGBTQIA+ people hold hands in public.
The long story of how I became the social media manager for the Haight Ashbury Merchants Association starts at our very own SF Mercantile, where the incredible unstoppable Robert Emmons took a chance on me (fresh off a plane from Texas, somewhere we had in common.) I was new to the city and Robert was opening his first retail store. There was a lot of new-relationships energy and it was a very exciting time to be at the corner of Haight and Cole. Even after he gave me a copy of Tales of The City to read, it still took me a while to relax into the open minded culture that exists in San Francisco (and is particularly alive and well in the Haight!)
It was my experience with the Clown Conservatory at Circus Center on Frederick Street that really helped me loosen up to west coast culture and learn my history, both of The Pickle Family Circus and The Haight Ashbury neighborhood where my instructors–including the likes of Sara Toby Moore (Ringling and Circus Bella) and Steve Smith (Ringling and Big Apple Circus)–told stories of being able to see Robin Williams performing stand up with Whoopi Goldberg at The Other Cafe (a historic location that is still a cafe in the Cole Valley community that is known today by well meaning techies for its baby strollers and excellent brunch choices.)
I feel incredibly fortunate to have absolutely lost my mind and gone to clown college when I did because I was part of the second to last Clown Conservatory graduating class before the pandemic began wreaking havoc on many industries, especially live entertainment. While I had dreams of touring again, life had other plans and a major injury during the pandemic and lack of access to medical care changed my priorities. While I may not practice pratfalls anymore, Clown Conservatory taught me other valuable life lessons about the importance of vulnerability, and how it’s better to be kind than nice, and (as Sara Toby Moore says) that “Love is the greatest technology.” I am forever grateful to have learned how to take something stressful or difficult and turn it into buoyant laughter, particularly as my parents age and need someone to give them a call and dispense buoyancy. Before Clown Conservatory I was a ball of social anxiety, and now when I am embarrassing in public I can just laugh about it. That is real, life-changing magic.
After almost a decade of trying to bend over backwards for other people’s entertainment, now my physical training focus is on finding a way to live and proselytize a life with the most physical comfort and mobility possible for as long as possible– especially in the face of an increasingly tech-focused workforce that can cause repetitive stress injuries and doesn’t encourage movement the way our lives did in the past. I believe that to be in motion and community connection is to be the most fully alive.
I learned so much from working for the Circus and the Haight Ashbury Merchants simultaneously. Multiple gigs is a common practice for show people to make ends meet and I am always looking for a new way to learn about my surroundings and meet fascinating characters. While in Clown School and working as a Clown Administrator and Haight Ashbury Merchant Social Media Manager I was lucky to take notes at city and community meetings, as a fly on the wall hearing about the struggles of community members in different roles, and to fall in even more in love with the place where I believe the ghost of the American Dream haunts us (in a Casper The Friendly Ghost sort of way.) Here in Haight Ashbury you can work for a small business while being accepted as yourself. You can find mentors to help fulfill your dreams and find joy knowing you are working to help another person fulfill theirs. Haight Ashbury is a real community of neighbors and it is beautiful to see every time I am here.
The more I’ve learned over the years about the history of Haight Ashbury the more I am in love with it. My obsession with the modern day Haight Street came from being included in the year of emergency pandemic merchant meetings and watching how this community still lives many hippie ideals about community and caring for your neighbors. I watched as the shelter in place weeks dragged on into months and the merchants worked together to make sure up to date information was accessible to community members, and that those who were unhoused were not abandoned to the difficulties of the pandemic. With Homeless Youth Alliance and community support the 730 Stanyan parking lot CAMP space helped more people experiencing homelessness get into housing than locations managed by other non profits or in different communities. I believe it is the love that has always been present in this community that made a real difference.
Each merchant I have had the opportunity to get to know chooses to do business in Haight Ashbury for a reason, and they represent the ideals of our community in their own way. Many of the merchants or their families have been here since around when Haight Ashbury was packed to the brim with hippies, musicians and The Diggers. They know and love this place and its history. They want to share that history and vision of peace and love with visitors and community members alike.
Personally, the merchants have been incredible mentors to me and given me so much grace as I have learned to be part of this beautiful colorful community.
Robert Emmons is forever my hero for still liking me after I left him and SF Mercantile to go to clown college. Naomi Silverman from Mendels has offered me so much grace as I have learned to handle my own small business financials. Christin Evans from booksmith has lent her ear on so many occasions when I needed encouragement or advice. Sunny Powers from Love on Haight has literally hand-held me through more life lessons than I can list here. Finally Dave from Mom’s body shop who passed away early in the pandemic told me “To take myself seriously and do what I loved.” with a kind of honesty I will always remember and cherish. I am so grateful to them for letting me be the kid who follows them around learning by example how to be a caring pillar of whatever communities I am in now and in the future. All of them have lived being the change they want to see in the world and would make Mr. Rogers proud to be our neighbor.
Way back before love, or circus, or San Francisco I lived in the frigid city of Rochester, New York and thought I wanted to be a photojournalist. So with a childlike amount of glee I am thankful to Linda Kelly of the Haight Street Voice for asking me to write for her hyper local global perspective magazine.
All that said: I love this place, I hope you do too and I hope to see you around Haight Street sometime soon. Introduce yourself and let’s take a selfie together, because I think it’s important to get pictures with the people you love.
Peace & Love,
Kenna
LINKS TO EXPLORE!
Haight Ashbury Merchants Social
Instagram @HaightAshburyLife
www.facebook.com/HaightAshburyLife
#HaightAshburyLife
Kenna M. Lindsay Social
@KennaMLindsayArt
www.facebook.com/KennaMLindsay
Local references
San Francisco Mercantile (shopsfmercantile.com)
Shop Hours & Info – Love on Haight (loveonhaightsf.com)
Mom’s Body Shop | Tattoos and Piercings on Haight Street (momsbodyshop.com)
Other things referenced
The Other Cafe | Home for the famous Haight-Ashbury comedy nightclub
Pickle Family Circus – Wikipedia
Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey
Big Apple Circus – Official Site
AMERICAN THEATRE | Circus Center Names a Real Clown, Steve Smith, as Its New Creative Director
Casper the Friendly Ghost – Wikipedia
Rochester, New York: The City Kodak Built – The Atlantic
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Thanks for the kind words! A LOT of effort put in, but definitely a labor of LOVE.